Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Cheeky collegue at work

Cheeky : "it is a word used to describe someone who does something or says something sort of rude / disrespectful".


I used it regularly and most of the times, it refers to my friends who do somethings funny but not harmful

However, in the following incidence, cheeky is not funny at all.


I work as as a consultant and am allocated a car spot at work, as 85% of my work is from the office.  I share that spot with my colleague (Belinda).  Whenever I am not in the office, I let her know to avoid her looking and paying for meter parking.  There is no private parking around the area.

Another naughty colleague of mine, Jon, often takes the spot at his own discretion without letting either of us know in advance.

Belinda has confronted him and explained that the spot is allocated and he should not take it.  If he really needs it, he should at least let me know so that I have coins with me to pay for meter parking.

Jon think it should be first come first serve and he has permission from his manager that it is ok to park.

He probably genuinely think that he has the point, which I think he is such a bully.

It is not a matter of car spot.  I think he is so disrespectful. 
- I was allocated the spot.  If he needs the spot, out of courtesy, why shouldn't I be informed?
- who is he to make the rules?
- if it should be first come first serve, it should applies to all employees.  It is not a car spot reserved for someone who makes his own rules.
- if he thinks it is unfair, speak to the boss who has made the decision to allocate the spot.  Don't be a cheeky smart ass.
- He is not sorry at all because he think he has the points.

What makes it more annoying.........  I see a whole day street parking, but have to get some coins change.  By the time I get back, it is taken.  So, he has turned his problem to mine. 

How cheeky, selfish, annoying, self-center he is?...............  VERY VERY MUCH SO............

Thursday, July 22, 2010

You and Relationships (The Circles - by Kerry Armstrong)

I have recently read a book "The Circles" by Kerry Armstrong, and would like to share that with you.  It is a tiny little book with only a few lines each page and easy to follow.

If you are puzzled about life and confused with relationships around you, this is a simple guide to sort out your feelings.  There are seven circles and you slowly putting down the names of people in your life according to where they fit in.  There is no right or wrong answer, just go with your instincts and sort out your feelings with people arounds you.  It is about You.

Below are some wise statements in the book that I would like to share and hope to encourage you to read the book for yourself :

"Sometimes we take people who love us for granted and spend more energy trying to please or impress new and exciting people".

"Benefit others.  If you can't benefit others, at least don't harm them." (Dalai Lama).

"I just had to realise how to not only be me, but how to let myself be.. and let everyone else in my life just be".

"We all want to feel good about ourselves........  Sometimes, how we feel about ourselves depends on how we let other people affect us...... Belonging to a group where you feel afraid to be yourself can be unsettling, sometimes even humiliatiing".

"You may end up feeling lonelier with the wrong people than you did on your own.... "

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Communication online

Internet is a great creation.  Majority of us at least use it an hour or two a day.

We read news, research, email, go to facebook, and drop a few lines for friends...   you name it.  It has become so important in our life.

If you ask a question of: what do you do on your day off, you normally get an answer like, sleeping in, shopping, suffing the net etc etc. 

Interesting enough, I just type 'what to do on day off', the list just goes on for more than 12 pages.  Not that we spend time defining what is day off, but rather, many of us post our stories and thoughts online.

Instead of catching up with friends after work or study, we need some quiet time, thinking time, relaxing time.  Reading other blogs allows us to share same interests, frustration, solutions.  It opens the social network for the less outgoing fellows.  We can think twice before posting comments and erase it as and when we want.

Althought it is easy and convenient, remember to stay in touch with real people around you.

When your husband/wife/partner/girlfriend/boyfriend are complaining that you spend too much time on the net, it is time for you start communicating.   Of course, never never call him/her a whinger.....  before you know it............  TROUBLES COME...........

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Thursday, July 1, 2010

A couple of hours help

I have recently caught up with Amy (yes.... I know I know,  finally).   As usual, we talked about everything, and of course, whinging about work.

She works 4 days a week.  Sometimes, she could be contacted on her day off, which is all good.  However, she finds it really frustrating at times when she was told her assistance Might Be needed for a couple of hours by logging on remotely to her office, without telling her the estimated schedule, not even morning or afternoon.

Firstly, it is her day off. 
Secondly, she believes that to be a supportive team member, she should help.  However, it is really hard to plan her day, when she does not know whether her help will Really be required.  If so, when.

Well, if she is going to stays at home waiting, might as well not having the day off.  It is bearable for such situation once or twice but definitely not constantly.

So, if you are in her situation, what would you do?
Or, have you put someone into that situation without knowing it?

We are all so busy with our life and the majority of us wants things done NOW, NOW and NOW.......

It may be the time  to:
- start planning, get things done earlier and leave some buffer time
- plan with others' schedule, availability and commitment in mind.
- stop feeling guilty for saying No, worrying that you will offend your colleagues/friends.
- to let others know your reason of saying No

If you are in Amy's situation and have brought up the problem but yet nothing works out, it is not your problem anymore.

You might be twisting and turnig in bed feeling sorry for yourself, but the person who causes it doesn't even care.
It is simply not worth it.